If You Don’t Kiss Me Now…I Think I’m Going to Throw Up! 💋


If you don’t kiss me now, I think I’m going to throw up.  These words were spoken about a minute after I met Brian for the first time.  I know what you’re thinking…what on earth?  Let me start from the beginning…

I had just gotten divorced in December, and it was March.  I was feeling sad for my children, but finally free.  I was making my own decisions, had more money in the bank than I’d had in the last 24 years because my ex husband wasn’t taking it all, and I was making my own decisions.  The last thing I needed was another man in my life.  During lunch one day, my friend and coworker, Susie, said I should meet the nicest man she and her husband had ever met.  He was divorced, and had four children.  Four children!!!  I had four children.  Was she crazy?  I must have been the crazy one, because we looked up his Facebook picture, and I said ok.  It took everything in me to “Friend” him because I had only had two boyfriends in my lifetime.  By friending him, I might actually like him and then have to go on a date with him.  I didn’t know how to date!  I had married my junior high boyfriend.  I had no idea what we would talk about until I noticed my younger cousin’s picture in HIS Facebook high school reunion pictures.  As I looked at more of his pictures, I noticed that he had grown up in Worland, and had gone to high school with her.  Wait a minute…that meant he was younger than me.  I had always envisioned myself with someone older.  After doing the math, I realized he was 2.7 years younger than me.  UGH!

After Brian “friended” me back, we started to text one another which led to talking on the phone.  I loved his voice and sense of humor.  He made me feel at ease.  We still hadn’t met one another and so we decided to go for a drive.  I would meet him at a designated location, and then we would get in his truck and go for a drive.  I was SO nervous!  What if he didn’t like me?  What if I didn’t like him?

I got in my car, drove to our designated spot, and waited.  He pulled up, I got out of my car, got into his truck and said, “Am I what you pictured?”  He grinned at me and said, “You look great.”  As we started to drive, I looked at him and said without thinking, “You’d better kiss me before I throw up.”  WHAT had just come out of my mouth???  He looked at me with the biggest grin and said, “Ok,” and gave me the best kiss I’d EVER had!  All I could say was “I liked that.  Can we do that again?”  WHAT was wrong with me????  Again he said, “You bet,” and gave me an even better kiss than before!  Right then and there, I knew this man was special.  He didn’t make fun of me or take advantage of me.  He treated my innocence and vulnerability with tenderness.  I had only kissed two other boys in my life.  This man kissed me like I had never been kissed.

This man treated me like I had NEVER been treated.  Only six weeks later, I was told that a lump had been found in my breast, and I needed to have a biopsy.  My first thought was to tell Brian that we should stop seeing one another because he had already lost his first wife, and didn’t need a girlfriend who might possibly be sick.  He lovingly told me, “I’m not going any where.”  Not only did he not go anywhere, but held my hand during the ultrasound, and took me to the hospital for my biopsy.

A week later, after sitting in a urologist’s office being told my son had cancer, I said the same thing I had said to him only a few weeks earlier…”we should probably break up because I’m going to be focusing on my son,” and he again replied, “I’m not going anywhere.”  My ex husband went golfing during my son’s surgery.  Brian talked to the doctors, sat with me and my son before the surgery, stayed with me during the surgery, and then took my son and me home from the hospital.  He didn’t go anywhere.  He stayed by my side, and my son’s side through the whole thing.  He was there during the chemo, went with us on my son’s Make a Wish trip, and made sure we always had everything we needed.  When my son needed a car, he bought him a car.  When my daughter needed a job to support her children, he gave her one,  He took care of my children and loved them as his own.  When my youngest asked him to adopt him, he said, “Yes,” because he already loved him as his own.

More than five years have passed, and during that time, Brian hasn’t gone anywhere.  He is always by my side…during the happy times, during the sad times, always there.  I will always be grateful to my crazy friend, Susie for thinking Brian and I would be great together.  More importantly, I am thankful that God had a plan for me, Brian, and our family.

Today, when I see my husband walk into a room, all I can think about is kissing his face, and I don’t even feel like throwing up anymore.

Brian and Heather


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